elenmosyne

It is now... June 2nd. Aside from this realization, it also strikes me - again - that I will be a whopping twenty-five in the span of six months and five days.

If you say six months doesn't go by quickly, peek real quick at the last six, and then sell that line again. Hint: it won't come out as convincingly to you, or at least, it shouldn't.

Beyond my own regular obsession with the fact that I'm finally approaching the point of no return and zenith of my youth, it occurs to me because somebody has a birthday party later today at 3. I had a discussion earlier this week about "appropriateness" of gifts for someone who's of middle school age, and had to explain why video games (let's get a pass card for Square Soft relics and all the other creative and thoughtful games/developers over the years) definitely don't rank up there on the "worthy and desirable" priority list, even if the gift-getter in question wants them.

We picked out something though that I thought he'd like and that also wouldn't be an invitation to sit on his butt clicking away at a 360/ps2-3/wii/whatever controller.

I understand the ways in which people think so little about what they feed children, anybody's children with.. their minds, their hearts, their eyes and their ears, but seriously, if I hear another sincere "why does it matter? they want it" from somebody I may just try to legalize good book reading and classy/interesting music listening amongst a million other things. I do have an unapologetic autocrat in me somewhere, that's for sure.

Half-jokes aside, video games aren't bad, but mostly I'd rather they be minimal in anybody's life - same with tv, beer-drinking, pop culture sex and beauty magazines (who -always- seem to have the secret to fifty gillion orgasms and that so sexy little number to wear to please your big hungering man..), and everything else that is if not the great satan, then at least dumb.

It's been a little while... and I've just been an eensy bit busy, one part being occupied with the practical demise of my car. It's facing the death hour: it's a '98 grand prix and we've gone the distance with eachother (in fact, cross-country and many Chicago-bound to and fro miles between), but right now it's looking grim. There's something wrong with the suspension or axel and it'll be about $900 to fix... which may not be worth it, ultimately.

It has 140k miles on it now. I bought it five years ago at a police auction of all places for a steal of $2k under the common value and it's been perfect.. but this might be the end of the line.

We'll see, but for now I'm driving a loaner Canyon, and I gotta say... I dig the truck. I always have had a thing against them because they're big and, honestly, I prefer cars.. amongst other reasons like parking and handling because of the low center of gravity (that's for no real reason except that I have a bad habit of taking turns fast when alone, though not dangerously so), but it isn't so in this case. I do not however dig gas prices.

It's enough to make me either pack up off to a big city and be a smart person who rides the bus or be someone who drives a Prius. And at a rated 60 city mpg... it closely justifies the $382/mo. payment in the longrun fuel savings.

I will never agreeably grasp Hummers or other large vehicles that're non-utility for reasons like that, especially as the emphasis on getting away from petroleum-bases is only going to increase as the years keep going by. The idea of throwing away money.. because you want something supersized to drive around in... does not blow my mind, but it does disgust me.

Then again I never will understand "status" purchases to ride around in anyway, because I don't have those same kinds of ego hang-ups to stumble around with.


One other thing:

I've been trying to lend a hand to someone lately who's having a little bit of a battle between a responsibility to somebody, then their limited time outside of school. They feel like they're being unfairly asked of in the situation... and to avoid going into specifics, basically they "technically" are dealing with someone else's problem, but it actually isn't a -huge- one to tend to. It is truly very minimal.

I don't know how to help people who are.. not a whiney person, but on certain matters they will -become one-. Against their other dispositions and responses. I don't know how to help them get from that step of: "I want to whine and sit here" to "I'm tired of whining and want to do something about it".

Ideally that second step'd be more like "...that was really ridiculous of me, I'm going to stop being that way right now", but that's not it here with this friend.

And under the surface I have this extremely negative reaction to people that are being irrational about something, and even when you're forced to tell them the fact that they are rather than stay silent, they continue to be. I understand their frustration... everybody gets frustrated, whether they handle it on their terms or they let others help them through it. I don't sympathize though with those who decide they'll actively persist in the "why me" act when someone else could use a hand from them. It is stupid, it is self-absorbed, and it is destructive... and utterly useless to boot.

It reminds me of like... it's like with younger kids, when they get upset for whatever reason and if it's for a valid one or a pretty minor one. The ones that start sobbing up a storm and wailing like the end of the world were nigh will do their thing.... but if you leave them alone and don't validate their behavior, they miraculously stop.

Miraculously? No. They just realize that there's no point and quit. That's all.

Some of them. Others continue long and the habit is highly difficult to break. I have no idea what to do for this person, but leave them alone to deal with it.. because they don't want any overtures of help, they want to complain right now. Otherwise they're a generally good person however, this fault and stumbling block of theirs aside.

A friend of mine earlier this week just realized how immature and egomaniacal people can get when they get dumped, particularly when all previous signs seemed to point to them being "nice" and "sweet"--it's not like it was anything new to her, but to know it and experience it are sometimes two different things for anyone.

She's busy doing rotations in Chicago for her second year med stuff at UofM, but luckily that keeps her busy between dealing with the about-face executed by her "sweetie" and trying to get acclimated to life in a new city. And since I've been seemingly pouring music out into tin cups lately to anyone that stops by and says, "heeeeyyyyyyy, oooh i like that what'cha listenin' to? can i have some?", it was only inevitable that another mix cd doth be begotten.

I think there are probably two or maybe three people on my friends-list that would have it in them to make majorly titanic tracklists--I'm genuinely not as -diverse- as some people, although my music tastes vary far and wide, or narrow and needle-like pending. They'd probably know how easy it is to pick 100+ tracks and then have to whittle it down from there for whatever the person'd like/would fit them most/be new and also engaging to them.

And seriously, there are things like listening to a handpicked selection of songs with you lesserly or greaterly in mind... but there aren't many that match popping a cd or three into a car player and not knowing at all what's about to come on, or what the person may have selected. It's you, the drive, whoever's listening with you, and deliberate songs. It's special, folks.

I cut this one down to about 46. Old songs, new songs, songs I don't like so much, songs I only like the unique sound to, songs I find funny as hell (track #5 on cd 3, because I am a white kid from Michigan), but Rabs'll appreciate them all. Maybe. Hopefully not. It's a lot of popular music and hits a lot of different things.

This is the way it went:








--

Jess: a spring peeper is a frog!
Jess: we went to a pond today and they were everywhere
Jess: my mom was like 'come hereeee little peepers!'
Don: and all she wanted was to find a prince
Jess: she got a stick and was pushing it into the mud to get one to swim
Jess: she already has a prince!
Don: but isn't your mom married too? ^_-
Jess: yea
Jess: to my dad!
Don: I know... I'm kidding, being all mean to the way that people change on you
Don: I'm sure they're super happy

( a vaguely related conversation )